Boys Will Be Boys….

by Lisa Donovan

I have gotten used to people (usually those without kids or those with girls only) looking at my son with great wonder - his preference to jump and run everywhere rather than to walk, his penchant for loud sound effects, his constant (albeit, articulate) banter with adults and kids, alike.  My mom has raised me to be utterly concerned with other people’s needs and opinions - or at least she tried.  It kicks in when necessary and occassionally I get bothered with it when it really doesn’t matter (my son being himself, with flourish, in the grocery store - for example).  I think when you have kids (overly-energetic boys or girls especially) you have to come to a point of agreement with yourself regarding how much you are willing to stress yourself and your kid out about how you are making strangers and those around you feel about your kids personality (notice I am saying “personality” and not “behavior” - strong personalities that can be overwhelming sometimes is what I am talking about, not bad behavior).  And, I think that the more you worry about it - putting all that negative energy into the situation - the more it becomes a problem.  When I make a big deal out of something that, in essence, really isn’t bothering me but I feel is bothering someone else - the problem becomes bigger.  Just something that I realized last night at our 4th of July picnic.  I started out overly concerned that my son, surrounded by very sweet, docile little girls, would offend someone or annoy someone.  He is pretty out there to begin with but, when surrounded by calm girls, by contrast he looks WAY out there.  Then this woman, god bless her, who - by the way- had no problem telling my son how to act, said to me “honey, boys will be boys - let him be”.  And I realized that he wasn’t doing anything wrong. He was just being himself and here I was, surrounded by people I didn’t know very well, worried more about what they thought or felt than I did about the fact that my kid was having a blast.  I relaxed and realized that I was the only one who was even concerned. Sure, everyone still made comments about his energy level and his propensity to kung-fu everything (even the cat) but, he’s a kid, and if you can’t pretend to kung-fu a cat when your six, when the hell can you? 

 

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This entry was posted on Wednesday, July 5th, 2006 at 10:23 am and is filed under Concerns and Expectations, Character Development. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

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