Archive for the 'Parenting' Category
Keeping Kids Active
It’s never too soon to start teaching fitness and play sports. Any child, whether they are crawling, walking novices, or big kids, can be athletic they don’t necessarily have to understand the rules of the game. All you do is make the activity age appropriate and you’re ready to hit the field, park, or playground. Starting sports activities young, also helps improve their hand-eye coordination as well and keeping their bodies in shape.
Crawlers. Join your child on all fours and “chase” him around the room and have him chase you. Sit down, with your legs spread, across from each other and roll the ball back and forth. Have races — roll the ball down a hall or across a room and “race” your crawler on all fours to get it.
Beginning Walkers. Build up their leg muscles by going for walks on different terrain — like sand, grass, hills, or pebbled beaches. Make sure you hold your toddler’s hand so they don’t fall. At this age, they’re ready to work out those arms by throwing and catching with a lightweight foam ball. They won’t be able to master the skill right away and the ball won’t hurt when they miss.
Big kids. By three years old your child should’ve mastered most of their motor skills and you can actually start introducing sports.
**Soccer. Kick the ball up and down a field and start teaching basic rules like not to use hands. You don’t have to buy expensive nets to teach your child how to kick a goal either. Stand with your legs spread apart and let your child practice kicking the ball between them.
**Baseball. Get a big oversized plastic bat and some whiffle balls. Focus on watching the ball and their stance — worry about running bases and what strike outs are for when they’ve mastered batting. Also work on throwing and catching. The rules can always be learned later.
**Tag. Nothing beats a good game of tag and the rules are simple enough that your big kid can grasp how a game of simple tag is played. “Tag you’re it.” Then explain that they have to now chase you. Three-feet-of-fun loves playing tag.
If you get your child started early they’ll always be healthy. It’s not about forcing them to learn sports or play if they don’t want to. It’s about finding games they like and have fun at that keeps them active and moving. Childhood obesity is on the rise but going to the park and running around for an hour might just be the cure.
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Surviving The Terribles
It’s like magic. On your child’s second birthday they go from being sweet and malleable to loud and stubborn. They suddenly tell you no, stop listening, start throwing tantrums, and that’s only the beginning. Welcome to toddler-hood and the terrible twos.
Take heart in the fact that you’re child isn’t telling you, “No!” to be horrible. They are trying to exert independence on their lives and grow. They also don’t ignore your, “No!” because they’re willful brats (even though it might seem like it) but because they want are so interested and focused in their new powers of propulsion and speech that they want to do everything even though they aren’t big enough yet.
Tips for surviving the twos (and threes and fours…)
Have a “no-free” room. Have one room in the house that is completely baby proof and that your child can do anything he wants to. Fill the room with their toys and let them explore and be independent, making their own decisions. A child is more likely to listen to “no” when they aren’t hearing it all the time.
Mean it. When you say “no” but then let your child do it anyway, you’re teaching them they don’t have to listen. Kids will constantly test their limits and if you don’t hold firm to the line that you’ve drawn they will always try to step over it. So when you say “no” mean it. While it won’t stop them from testing it completely, it will cut down the battles.
Offer alternatives. A child’s brain doesn’t work the same way ours does and they can be incapable of thinking of anything else but the activity you’re saying no to so sometimes it’s easier to get your child to stop doing something if you offer something else to take its place. Often redirection of their attention will be a better option than telling them no. Make up a new game, put together a puzzle, or offer to do an activity you don’t often to.
Bribes. It’s never to early to start. It doesn’t have to be candy. It can be time spent with a favorite toy, a bubble bath, blowing bubbles, or any activity that is not often done. Get creative and you’ll be surprised with what you can accomplish with a little bribe and trickery.
Nobody likes to be constantly bossed around and your toddler is no exception. Unfortunately for them, they aren’t grown up enough to make the right choices and do everything they want to do which can ultimately be frustrating to them. So help them to navigate the terribles easier by following the above tips.
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Know the Signs
Bad babysitters. All parents think it’ll never happen to them or pray that it never does. But how do you know if your caregiver is treating your baby or toddler right while you’re away when the child doesn’t necessarily have the language skills to tell you otherwise? Some parents resort to surveillance equipment measures but that might not actually be necessary. While your child can’t sit you down and say, “Mom, Dad, Sally treats me horribly. Can’t we do something about this?” He does have the means to tell you if you know what cues to look for.
Baby temperament. Now there is no way a babysitter can ever replace a parent in a baby’s eyes but he should be at least happy to see the sitter. If the baby is anxious, crying, or otherwise unhappy, that could be a sign that there is something more going on.
Secrets. Your caregiver should be able to tell you, down to the last detail, a play by play of their entire day with your child. If your babysitter is secretive or can’t account for time spent with your child it is usually because they have something to hide. If they can’t be upfront with you then they don’t need to be alone with your child.
Accidents and injuries. Accidents and boo-boo’s happen but if they are happening frequently and could be easily avoided that could be a sign that your babysitter isn’t keeping their eye on the ball, as it were. Your sitter should be in constant attendance with your baby.
Cleanliness. Kids get dirty — it happens. But your caregiver should be capable of cleaning them up regularly so they aren’t completely filthy. If you get your child back as a mess on a regular basis that could be a sign that they aren’t capable of taking care of your child.
One of these by themselves might not mean you have a bad babysitter but if you have two or more, you should seriously consider looking elsewhere for child care. It doesn’t matter how carefully a sitter is screened and referred there is always a chance that you got a bad apple. So keep vigilant on the interactions between your child and sitter for your own piece of mind as well as your child’s welfare.
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Losing Baby Weight
Losing the baby weight can be easier said than done especially because you are carting around a new baby everywhere you go. Yes, it’s true you burn more calories while breastfeeding and it can help you lose some weight, you still need to workout. Where do you find the time especially when you don’t trust a sitter with your little bundle of joy yet?
Being a new parent can zap your energy and sleep will take on a new precedent in your life that you didn’t even imagine. But did you know that even ten minutes here and there a few times a day is almost as good as a straight half hour and it sure beats doing nothing at all. Here are some great tips of what you can do with baby in tow to help work off the weight you gained while pregnant or the sympathy weight you gained while your partner was pregnant.
Hiking. If you love nature, it’s never too early to share the joy of it. Get a front carrier that makes sure your back and your baby is well supported, don the hiking boots, and find an easy trail to navigate. It helps if you like what you’re doing for exercise, it keeps you at it.
Walking. It always helps to change out of the ratty sweats you’ve been wearing for four days straight and go for a walk around the block. Brush you hair, change your clothes, put on your sneakers, and then put your baby in a stroller for a walk around the block. It gets you out of the house and exercise. There are also great mom-and-baby stroller exercise groups where you get to meet other moms and incorporate your baby into the routine.
Videos. Take advantage of all the sleeping your infant does and pop in a workout tape and get to sweating. This is especially nice when the weather is rainy, snowy, or otherwise too cold to take your new baby out into. Exercise videos are also a great way to squeeze in a quick workout in your busy schedule.
Exercise is a great way to fight postpartum depression because of the natural high the release of the endorphins gives you. So you’re not only losing the baby weight. Exercise is always better with a friend so grab your spouse, your partner, or a friend and get to stepping.
Posted in Uncategorized, Health, Activities, Exercise, Outdoors, Exercise, Healthy Living, Mental Health, Stress Management, Weight Management | No Comments »
Mastering Manners
While you can’t expect a toddler not to talk with his mouth full or interrupt while you’re having a conversation with another adult, it’s still never to early to start teaching them manners. A very important lesson and one if they master will make your life and the life of your child’s so much easier.
They won’t master the concepts right away but if you start incorporating the idea of manners early when you start getting particular and expect them to conform to using them they’ll be more receptive and less rebellious about it. Your child is already learning how it is to behave acceptably by testing your limits and if you are consistent and behave appropriately as well then they will catch on to whole manners idea even faster.
Here are some great tips on how to start teaching your child good manners.
Learning to share. Toddlers fight over other children having the use of their toys as they haven’t mastered the idea of sharing. Help to encourage sharing by teaching your child that he can’t have all the toys if he wants other children to play with him. Start with ground rules. Everyone will have a turn with the toys. There will be no hitting, shoving, biting, yelling, or name calling. Help your child out and if he has an absolute favorite toy, put that toy up so there aren’t any unnecessary fights. When your child gets older he can learn to share even that which is his favorite but he’s still young as of yet. Most importantly praise your child effusively on what a great job he did while sharing.
A polite hello. A toddler can definitely learn to greet people and say goodbye when addressed by others. They might not always be successful as they are prone to fits of shyness at any given time but it’s still a good thing to encourage the behavior. Build them up by talking about when the company arrives they’re going to say, “Hi,” to make the company feel welcome in their home. Don’t force the child. If he’s being shy just make it a point to mention he should say hi and move on. Be patient, they’ll eventually get the idea and be braver about doing it.
Teach by example. The best way to encourage your child to start using manners is for them to see you using them everyday. Always use please and thank you even when addressing your child and asking for things. When the child asks you for something gently encourage them to use the “magic words” or ask them to say please. As a toddler you can’t expect them to remember to ask nicely every time but a quick reminder should help them to remember.
Toddlers are sponges and they learn best by taking in their environment better than being told what is expected of them. If you want your child to have great manners then show them how by practicing them yourself. Share your things with others, extend polite greetings wherever you go, and always use the magic words.
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Tour of Duty (Sleep Part 3)
Welcome to having a big kid. You’ve waved a sad goodbye to naps and your munchkin isn’t so little anymore. Welcome to having a big kid and with that joy comes the fact that you can now reason with your child. It’s no longer a battle of wills and Mommy said to go to bed. Now you can begin to teach your child the importance of getting a good night’s sleep.
Big kids, ages five to twelve, still need around ten to eleven hours of sleep at night. Now your child is old enough that you can explain how important sleep is and that the hormones that help them grow are released during sleep. Use the analogy that sleep helps the brain to function better and enable the child to do better in sports, play, and school.
As with each new age level different tricks help aid in getting a full night’s rest.
Serotonin. About an hour before bedtime give out sleep inducing snacks: milk, half a cheese sandwich, turkey, or peanut butter, or bananas with oatmeal. These all release Serotonin which is a natural sleep instigator. Also make sure you cut the caffeine at least six hours before bedtime.
No homework. No that doesn’t mean they don’t have to do their homework, they just don’t get to do it before bed. You want your child’s brain to be engaged in sleepy type thoughts not working out their math problems. This engages the brains activity and can keep them actively thinking long after they should be fast asleep. Schedule homework time to be done after school or before dinner so they have time to wind down before bed.
Exercise. Make sure your child gets enough activity during the day to help be sleepy at night. However make sure this is done in plenty of time before bed. Exercise releases endorphins and also helps with energy levels which are certainly not something you want your child to have a lot of right before bed. So avoid energetic games before bed and use before bedtime to settle down with a book or some quiet family time.
Enforce bedtime. Night owls are a common problem that is usually caused by parents. Your child has been in school, played with friends, worked on homework, and any other myriad of things and you just want to spend some time with them. If a child needs at least ten hours of sleep to function at their highest potential then it’s up to you to make sure they get their Z’s.
The child isn’t going to say, “No Mom, I’ve got to go to bed.” They’re going to work the angle to stay up later. Be strong.
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Boot Camp (Sleeping Part 2)
You’ve got this sleeping thing mastered and your tot is practically sleeping through the night. Believe it or not he probably is because “sleeping through the night” according to pediatricians is six straight hours. But just when you think it’s safe to relax your sweet baby turns into a toddler.
Toddlers don’t want to sleep. They want to explore their world and not miss a thing. However now that they aren’t sleeping all throughout the day, they need sleep now more than ever. Luckily for you toddlers and preschoolers thrive on routine. But it’s up to you to be strong and keep up the steady bedtime routine even if they try to cajole, scream, or whine their way out of it.
Here are some great bedtime routine tips to keep your child in healthy sleep habits.
Don’t over do it. In order for the routine to be effective and trigger the time to go to sleep response in your child you have to be prepared to do it every night. If your bedtime routine takes hours is that something you’re always going to be able to do? Keep it short and sweet. Fifteen to twenty minutes is sufficient enough time from pj’s to bed to get your child ready to hit the pillow. Two books before bed and a song once their tucked in is plenty.
Early to bed. Toddlers need twelve to fourteen hours of sleep a day and Preschoolers need eleven to thirteen so it’s important they get their nighttime rest. If your child isn’t getting at least ten hours at night it can make for a fussy, whiny, unpleasant day. For this age group it’s best to set the bedtime between 7 - 8pm. This way even if they fight sleep they still have enough nighttime hours to recharge their batteries.
I need a drink. Children are amazingly clever and they will do anything possible to delay the inevitable bedtime. Nip this behavior in the bud by only allowing one delay tactic after you’ve tucked them in. Otherwise they will work this tactic to death. The best way to deal with that is to give the child something tangible. I made a free pass for Three-feet-of-fun and when he gives it to me for a drink or he forgot a stuffed animal or something then he’s done.
It can be completely adorable the reasons children come up with to get out of bed. Even if it tickles your funny bone you need to be stern and follow the routine. They don’t know how important it is that they get their sleep — but you do.
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Basic Training (Sleep Part 1)
Babies can sleep anywhere up to eighteen hours a day. Sounds marvelous, doesn’t it? Sure. Until you find out that they only sleep in two to three hour bursts. This is especially draining on new parents. The best advice to give new parents is, “Sleep when the baby sleeps.”
While sage advice, it isn’t always possible. There are bills to pay, laundry to wash, housework to be done, so here are some helpful ways to get the little tot to sleep in longer stretches at night so you can catch up on some much needed ZzZz’s. These are also the basic training steps in teaching your baby how to sleep through the night.
Sleepy not sleeping. It’s tremendously important to put your baby to bed when he is drowsy but not asleep. You want to start encouraging good sleeping habits while their young, makes it much easier later on. The baby needs to learn to fall asleep on his own. If you put the baby to sleep and then lay him down, when he wakes in the night (other than hunger) he’s going to need and expect you to put him back to sleep — and they do wake up missing you.
Stimulations. Treat bedtime like its serious business. When laying your child down, do it with very little fanfare. No extra coddling, talking, cooing, nothing to stimulate your child into think its playtime. Same goes for night wake ups. When you go into the room for night feedings or emergency diaper changes don’t talk to your child or make eye contact. Just do what needs to be done with expedience and precision. You have to teach your baby that night time is for sleeping and if you engage your child you’re sending mixed signals.
Nightlights. Babies don’t know the difference between a light and the sun. So, you want to make sure that you keep the babies room as dark as possible at night so they can learn. I recommend a low wattage nightlight that leaves enough light to see by but not enough to be disturbing. It’s imperative that when the child wakes in the night that you don’t turn on extra lights. That keys the child into thinking its daytime which equals playtime.
These are the beginning steps to helping train your child on how to sleep through the night. And while you might not get through the night just yet, you’ll be amazed what a solid four to five hours will do for you.
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Finding a Preschool (Part 2)
Now you’re ready to move on to actually finding a school. You’ve weighed the different philosophies and decided on the one or couple that would best work for you and your child. The next step is doing the research — is there one of those schools in your area?
Word of Mouth. The best way to find good schools is by asking around. Ask your friends and family if they know of any schools in the area that are reputable. Strike up conversations with parents at parks or at the library to ask where their children go and if they’d recommend it. A personal reference is much better than an ad in a phone book.
Expert Help. The Childcare Aware hotline 800-424-2246 is an excellent resource to find schools in your area. They can give you the local numbers for childcare referral agencies and they can give you the skinny on great schools in your area. You can also get a list of accredited preschools in the area and while that doesn’t necessarily guarantee those schools will be a good fit for you it’s a good place to start looking.
Phone book. This is a last resort resource. The Yellow Pages don’t screen preschools anyone who buys ad space can put their school in the book. It’s an excellent starting point if you need it but remember you must do your homework.
Any school you decide on needs a closer look before you enroll your child. Make sure you not only interview the director over the phone but you go down and visit the school during school hours to get a feel for how the school truly is.
Questions to ask over the phone:
1.) Fees. If it’s a private preschool it will have some
2.) Hours. A school is no good if you need an 8 am to 5 pm and they’re only open til noon.
3.) Student to teacher ratio (7 students to 1 teacher is the ideal for ages 3 and 4)
4.) What holidays or weeks are they closed
5.) Their discipline philosophy
6.) Nutrition. Do they supply the food? Do you? Are there things you couldn’t send in a lunch? Things of that nature
7.) Lists of the daily activities
If you like what you hear then you want to schedule time to visit. You’ll want to meet the director and the staff. See the facilities, the play area, examples of the daily activities, and see if the kids generally seem to be having a good time.
Things to keep an eye out for while visiting:
1.) Is it a clean and safe environment
2.) Do the teachers seem happy with their jobs
3.) Do the kids seem happy with their teachers
4.) Is the equipment outside taking care of and safe
Don’t be afraid to ask questions and poke your nose around their facility. This is a place your child is going to spend a lot of time in when you aren’t around to make sure their safe. You can never be too careful choosing a school — do your homework.
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Finding a Preschool (Part 1)
With the start of the school year fast approaching some thought needs to be given about preschool and getting your child acquainted with the idea of school before they “have” to go. How do you find the school that is best for you and your child? Here is a list of things to do and consider in deciding on a school for your child.
What do you want out of a preschool?
Do you want your child to be in a structured learning environment or one that is less structured and incorporates activities like story time, singing, and dancing? There are five different preschool philosophies: Montessori, Waldorf, High/Scope, Bank Street, and other types.
The Montessori approach focuses on learning at a child’s own pace about different cultures, animals, plants along with reading, language, and math. Guides, what the ‘teachers’ are referred as, help encourage independence in children by asking the child if they want to try the task, need help doing it, or aren’t quite ready for it.
The Waldorf approach believes that a person is made up of the body, the spirit, and the soul. They focus on teaching children by stimulating these elements with creativity and their surroundings — painting, singing, stories, dress-up, and other things of that nature. Children get a lot of free play instead of watching TV, videos, or computer games.
The High/Scope approach revolves around a theory that children need to be interactive with people, ideas, materials, and events. And while they focus on letting the child be independent and let the children pick the activities they want to be engaged in, the teachers work closely side by side so that there is a lot of teacher/pupil interaction.
The Bank Street approach is considerably less structured and focuses on fostering a child’s development by offering different opportunities for physical, emotional, cognitive, and social growth — children are explorers, experimenters, and artists. Children in this type of school play with toys and materials that stimulate their imaginations with little or no structure.
Other types of schools generally don’t follow any one approach to the hilt but incorporate a lot of the different aspects of the other approaches into a melting pot of what works for them. So it’s important to know what you’re looking for in a school for your child so you know if the school offers what you want for your child. Not any one approach is more right than the others. It really just depends on how your child likes to learn and what you want your child to get out of the experience.
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