Give Me My Blanket
By: Ron Huxley, LMFT
Children often have a favorite blanket or stuffed animal to soothe them when they are going to sleep. Something about that soft, warm touch that allows them to settle down and relax. A lot of angry people have difficulty soothing themselves. This might be due to genetics – they are wired a little tighter or have a hyper temperament. These are the people who are always on the go and can't seem to sit still for more than a few minutes. They are also the type to explode in rage more rapidly to "seemingly" less important issues. Anger is in itself an arousing energy force. Its purpose is to get us moving towards or away from a challenging situation for the sake of self-preservation. If that anger is chronic, occurring frequently in our lives, it can leave toxic chemicals in our bodies that will affect our health and make it hard to react calmly to live events.
Learning to soothe ourselves may be as easy as getting ones blanket back and taking a nap. Rest has its rejuvenating effects on our nervous system. It might mean taking a longer vacation without the daily distractions of multimedia devices. One can also be more prudent and practical by doing something for yourself daily (or multiple times per day) that is healthy and relaxing. Take short breaks to walk around, read a book, or talk to a friend.
Learning to breath and meditate is a very valuable skill and numerous books and organizations are available to teach this "blanket" for our anger energy. A powerful, meditative skill is to learn to be in the moment. Set your timer for 3 minutes and allow your mind to observe everthing that approaches your senses in the time span. If you mind wanders, just bring it back to the moment. Breath naturally during this time and observe sight, sound, smells. Do this daily to reset your angry nervous system and release healing chemicals into your body.
Need a little help managing your anger and stress? Ron Huxley is a licensed family therapist, anger management consultant and author/speaker. Join one of his convenient online groups or request a private, one-to-one consult now at http://angertoolbox.com/angersmart.html