Do you struggle to have a meaningful conversation with your parents? Beth Sanders has some great conversation starters and tips to remember next time you pick the phone.
One of the most significant underlying assumptions that many people internalize is, “I must avoid conflict at all costs; if I let others know what I think and feel, I might get disappointed and hurt.” However, “sweeping things under the rug” tends to eventually magnify unresolved interactions and events. Resentment, which looms on the other side of our passive behavior, clouds our confidence and judgment.
Often, we believe that others ought to treat us the way we want them to respond. We may tend to put a relationship on a pedestal expecting more from an interpersonal relationship than it can deliver. Then when others fail to meet our expectations, we feel betrayed, frustrated, and resentful.
The impact of intimacy lies at the core of every significant relationship. Cultivating intimacy takes a lot of work. Intimacy is a complex set of feelings and behaviors that develop out of a relationship based upon integrity, commitment, passion and respect.
What in the heck happened? Why didn’t I see it coming? I guess I should give myself a break. I suppose you have to live with a partner before fully understanding the differences in the way people “live.” It didn’t take me long to find out that we lived on polar planets.
Those who have been abused generally have experienced a roller-coaster ride of emotional upheaval. They have learned to doubt their own instincts, minimize the pain of betrayal, and have succumbed to the manipulation, or power and control of their mates. They will talk about horrid manifestations of abuse without any emotional intensity attached to the experiences. The discussion of their stories comes across as an afterthought.
The abuser generally has minimal insight into the significance of his problem. Raging and physical intimidation emerge naturally out of a sense of entitlement. The underlying assumption of the perpetrator of violence is, “People must act the way I want them to or they will pay for their actions.”
As impossible as it might seem, it’s crucial for parents to maintain intimacy in their relationship. Not only is it essential for the marriage, it’s also important for the children. Here’s six tips to help parents keep the spark alive in their marriage.